|A Long Time Ago!
I asked Mr. UT to write another post, and when I read his words I thought they seemed a bit down, or negative. While we were in the car wash, (with tricolor foam), I asked him if he was still worried about my drinking. He said he still remembers the times he came home from work, thinking things were ok, and found me drunk. He said that thought pops up from time to time.
What I learned is these conversations need to happen. I need to know what he is thinking, so I can keep his worries close to my heart. He is worried because he loves me.
I love this man.
Words from Mr. Untipsy:
It has been three and a half years since Untipsy Teacher quit drinking. Three and a half years or 42 months or 1277 days. No matter how you count it, it is a long time. Yet, I can still remember the time before she became sober. The arguments, the sneak drinking, the worrying, lying and mistrust. Sometimes it seems like yesterday and I have to remind myself to concentrate on the here and now. It can be too easy to worry about what might happen instead of focusing on what is happening, and what is happening is amazing.
Untipsy Teacher has worked hard on gaining her sobriety. She has developed tools and found a community that works for her, she has reached out to help others and in the process, she has helped herself. She has also helped me and she has helped our marriage. During the past three and a half years, we have learned how to have fun, socialize and live without alcohol.
We need to remember all of these valuable lessons, but it is also important to remember the past and the reasons why we stopped drinking in the first place. I will never take for granted the hard work and determination Untipsy Teacher has put in to get to where she is now. I think that is an important lesson we need to keep in mind. Whether it is three and a half years or three and a half days, value the sober here and now, but remember the trouble, pain and heartbreak of the past. Knowing the cause of that pain can only help make us more determined to prevent it from returning. That knowledge can give us strength.
Seeing UnTipsy Teacher’s determination makes me work a little harder in life, though I still need to work harder on my diet and lose a few more pounds.
Learn from the past, celebrate the here and now and work for the future. Someone much smarter than me coined these words decades ago but this phrase is as true today as ever.
Remember why you quit drinking in the first place. Celebrate all that you have accomplished. Enjoy your sober life today and keep working to strengthen your resolve and commitment to your future. Remember, it is your future. You are getting sober for yourself. You are no good to anyone else until you are taking the steps to help yourself, and in so doing you will be helping everyone around you.
Our future looks so much better than it did three and a half years ago. Not drinking has brought UnTipsy Teacher back to me and we want our lives to stay that way. I still get worried that I am taking for granted that our present lives will remain unchanged. No one knows the future but you can work to make it what you want it to be. It may not be perfect and it might not even be what you had planned on but it will be better without drinking, and that is what is important to remember.
Today I am grateful for UnTipsy Teacher’s three and a half years sober. It is an accomplishment to celebrate.
With a Clean Car,
On Day 1277,
Mr. and Mrs. Wendy
PS – I published this a day early. My sobriety date is September 4, 2014