You Are Already A Star

Dear Readers,

A Flower I Found

“We can think of ourselves as a brilliant star; significant, yet small compared to the endless expanse of space around us.” 

“There’s much that is beyond our capabilities and much we don’t know, but that doesn’t diminish what we know and can do. We can feel humble seeing how our strengths contribute to the whole”.

(From the book, A Woman’s Way through The Twelve Steps)

What if you could forgive yourself.
What if you could accept every thing you hated about yourself.
What if you could put down the drink, and hug yourself, and tell yourself you are loved.
What if you could see that just being you, that just you reading these words, you are a star. You have nothing to prove, no one you have to be, just you.

This is what I had to learn, and still practice every day. It’s the only way I have been able to become a more joyful person. I am learning to accept everything the way it is. 

My life is not harder or easier than others, it just is.

On A Walk

The universe is not out to get me.

I look around and see other people, and I see their lives are not mine to live, and they do not live mine.

Everyone has pain. Everyone has joy.

There was no other way for me to stop drinking until I fully forgave myself for past drinking times, for hating myself, for not being perfect.

Being perfect is an illusion.

This took awhile. With the help of a good therapist, reading, and reframing my self-talk, I was able to learn. When I find I am getting angry at myself about something, I once again, remind myself I am only human. 

I have to have compassion for myself, or I can’t give it to other people.

I don’t need to be anything but Wendy. I am loud, I can get too silly, I can be jealous, I can be judgmental, I can feel sorry for myself, but I know I am still ok. 

Gratitude and acceptance are cornerstones for me. 

I wish this gift for you.

Happy Birthday, Hubs!

You are loved, you are strong, you are worthy. You don’t need to drink, to shine for anyone. You already are shining.

With All the Stars, 

On Day 1415,

PS – Hubs just had his birthday! He got ice cream, which is our big treat! LOL

18 thoughts on “You Are Already A Star

  1. Beautiful post, Wendy, and just what I needed. I often find myself full of regret over my past actions, it's important to remember I need to forgive myself. Happy Birthday to Mr. UT!! And, are those Emmys he's posing with? xx


  2. Beautiful post. Thank you, Wendy, for the hope and light at the end of the tunnel. I'm still struggling to feel \”joyful\” again. It's been six months and the pink cloud has long drifted off. So maybe it's time to consider a therapist. Love your blog! Happy birthday to hubs. Mine is up in Alaska fishing for our annual supply of halibut and salmon. We are blessed. x 🙂


  3. Hi Joni! Cool about the fresh fish your hubs is getting! A therapist definitely helped me. I also learned that joy isn’t always a jump and and down joy, but appreciation of what I have. xoWendy


  4. You may not be perfect, Wendy, along with the rest of us. But what you are is WISE…and getting wiser all the time, it seems to me. And you share that wisdom in such a giving and compassionate and important way. Some of these truths…we may know them, or be trying to learn them…but it also seems like we can¡t hear them too often! And along with your welcome words, your photos just seem to be getting lovelier all the time; those lilies are gorgeous. Big birthday wishes to your other half…you are such a photogenic, and happy-looking, couple! Good on ya……


  5. I think you've hit at the core of what happens in sobriety: you learn to love and forgive yourself. It's a work in progress for me, but it's happening!!!Beautiful writing. You're one of my favorite stars. ; )


  6. 1415 days! Absolutely smashing it Wendy! It's been a while but glad you're doing so well – that poetry and reflection is rather beautiful. I bet Wendy 4 years ago or so would be real proud to see how much you've grown and wise you've become ;).Much love,Francis


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