21 Months

Our First Bike Ride
Dear Readers,
Thank you for your concern about my mom and myself!
The good news is, we have both healed.
I am home for a week, and then will be gone again for more packing!

Today I have been a non-drinker for 21 months.
And today, I am ready to make a shift in my thinking.
I am tired of my poor me, missing out thoughts that sometimes enter my head. 
I don’t get these thoughts often anymore, but when I do, I am not happy.

I want to take lessons from the sober people who are almost giddy they stopped.
I find these people in the blogging world, as well as in AA.

Centennial Lakes Park is our Favorite

And so, right at this minute, I refuse to let those thoughts enter my head.
I am so thankful I heeded the call to stop drinking.
I was in denial for so long.

It takes a lot of courage to stop drinking.
To be totally honest and say, this has to stop.

And then, it takes a big shift in thinking, that says, I am glad I stopped.
I am glad I don’t have to worry about the things that might or would have happened if I kept drinking.
I am glad for all the good things that I have because I stopped.
And to be glad in all situations, even a party where all your close friends are still drinking.

I want to be a role model that says, look here…I can be sober and be happy!
I don’t need to be all morose.
It’s only alcohol. 
It’s time for me to grow up a little more.

There will be times to practice my new way of thinking, very soon.
I will be attending a family wedding, as well as going to small dinner parties.
And I want to go with a message of I am happy sober.
Giving people I love hugs and kisses.

For them.
For hubs.
For me.

With Much Love,
On Day 639,

42 thoughts on “21 Months

  1. Congratulations, Wendy! 21 months is fantastic! I appreciate what you say here. Being glum about quitting drinking isn't the way forward. But I have to say, I also appreciate how honest you've been all along. Sometimes when people only seemed happy about having quit it seems like it's only part of the story, and you have always written about the ups and the downs. I found so much solace in that. And at the same time you look radiant in your photos and you are obviously happy about being sober. You're already a huge role model for me! I'm glad you and your mother are doing well, and I'm glad you're embracing a new enthusiasm about being sober! xo


  2. This I kind of weird to read as you are so positive and encouraging to all of us I think we all assume it is all rainbows and singing birds living in your mind. You don't give that impression but obviously you know how things are for you better than we do. It's admirable you want to be a happier sober ambassador and you will be challenging convention as everyone thinks we are a bunch of miserable dry drunks only thinking about how good the days of drinking were and angry that we can't be there. You rock Wendy keep spreading the happiness.


  3. Congratulations on 21 months!!! I have started again, I'm determined this time, and I've had similar thoughts to you, in that I want to change my perspective. I am going to practise feeling happy that I've stopped drinking, and focus on putting good things in my life instead of just cutting out the booze and booze-related things. I know it's up to me to make my life better and happier and I really want to do this.I think you are a walking advert for how to be happy sober anyway, but it's so great that you're feeling even more positive and happy now! Lots of love,Waking up xxx


  4. Wonderful that you have 21 months of sobriety! I love the pictures Wendy. It looks as thought everything, including yourself, is coming into bloom. I went to bed last night extremely tired but so grateful that I don't make my body feel as dreadful as I used to. That I am no longer poisoning myself for pleasure…Lots of love, Claire xxxps. you have been my role model


  5. Dear Wendy,Congratulations on your month 21! And also thank you for correcting my stupid calculations because I had me thinking I was in month 22. Stupid concussion. :-D.Glad to hear you and your mom are doing better! Enjoy the biking. Biking = good. Says the Dutch person. :-)xx, Feeling


  6. It's funny to me, because you want the excitement of other sober people…That is what I see from you!!!!! You are one of my sobriety role models!!! Congratulations on 21 months! Wow! And, you and your hubs are just sooooo cute!!! xo


  7. Thirsty, you are so right.It has been up and down for me!I hate to bore people with my depression issues, and anxiety, but at the same time, many of us suffer from these.Right now my struggles are with my sleeping cycle, as it is all mixed up. But right now the sun is shining, hubs got donuts, and all is well!xo


  8. I know, right?They think we can't possibly be fine not drinking.And there are times that are hard. But I just am ready to let go of the poor me thing. It's about time as I am not getting any younger!We will be the ones going home without a worry about driving or spinning rooms!xo


  9. Dear Waking Up,You have had a lot of emotional times.I still do myself, as I suffer from depression and anxiety.But cutting out drinking really has been nothing but a positive for me!xo


  10. Hi Claire!We have had the most lovely blooms this spring!I see new ones pop up all the time!I have enough problems without adding drinking to the mix.That indeed made things worse!xo


  11. I, too, suffer from depression and anxiety. Alcohol only made them worse. Plus, I had to keep drinking more and more to get the same level of relief. Although I can't say my life is exciting and wonderful because I gave up drinking, I can say I stepped back from potential harm and unknown consequences. I took a good, hard look at how my 3 strong G&Ts every night just weren't enough anymore and decided to stop drinking for a few months instead of climbing up the ladder to a fourth drink every night. I liked not drinking better, so I kept at it until now, I've lost track of how many years I have been sober, 5? Amazing how little space alcohol takes up in my thoughts now. I wish all the best to you, too!


  12. I know that when I write upbeat positive posts I am very often doing so in order to focus on the upbeat and positive aspects of my life. If I creep around looking only at everything that is wrong that is all I will see. It would be like going on a bike ride through your beautiful park and only noticing the occasional piece of litter on the track. Thank you for all you do in focusing on the flowers, not the litter, and huge congratulations on your 21 months! It'll be a couple of years before you know it 😉 xxx


  13. you're very welcome. happy Friday and hope you have a good one!! my blog was down for a few days, but it's back now fyi 🙂


  14. I like you plan. I am giddy I stopped. But I am still human and have ups and downs.Somewhere along the way I realized the downs really have nothing to do with a lack of booze.Take a day and watch some drunk people at a bar. It's not very pretty and it doesn't look fun. It looks tiring.You are doing an awesome thing! And you share it with us. That's true connection.Anne


  15. Thank you for sharing this Wendy. You've reminded me that how we handle things…like finding joy in life (while not-drinking) is a choice. I love the power that you take back when you say that you ARE going to really enjoy being present in your own life, sober. I get those same voices that you talk about…they are not strong anymore but still there sometimes, making me feel left out and a little defective…thank you again so much for writing this. You are an inspiration.Jenn


  16. Just thinking about you Wendy and hoping you are ok. I always miss reading your comments around all the blogs. I know you are moving your mom to your brother's I think you said. Take care of yourself and hubs.


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